![Cubs fight]()
If I were a Chicago White Sox fan, I'd be screaming into my own mirror like Jake Gyllenhaal in
Nightcrawler, hopefully minus the accidental slice wound on my hand from the broken glass.
I'd be wondering what my life became...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FRPF-7BxKNU
Then I'd have the decency to curl up into a ball on the floor thereafter, clutching a bottle of Malört that'd already be half-gone, and at least sob myself to sleep in a slop of vomit and tears rather than taking out my misplaced, imbalanced anger on others at the supposedly friendly confines of a ballpark.
Alas, some MLB lovers just can't keep it together in the Windy City. Again, not that I blame them. Cubs supporters have all that scar tissue from not winning a World Series for over a century, and their 3-1 win over the lowly Sox on Saturday eve improved their record to one game below .500.
But
the White Sox are in a whole other world of pain, with a 28-91 mark that makes you wonder just how low morale, pride, and competence can be in a major professional sports franchise. Combine all those toxic elements with the innate bitter rivalry between the Cubbies and Sox in Chicago, and you get the following fight at Guaranteed Rate Field:
https://twitter.com/ChicagoCritter/status/1822702109776548113
The latest footage of sports goers beating themselves to a pulp is most unfortunate in particular because a woman was involved in the scuffle. Never want to see that, nor should any encounter amongst strangers come to blows with fists. Here we are nevertheless.
Things are actually going well for the Cubs of late, it turns out. They're only 3.5 games out of a Wild Cart spot in the National League.
https://twitter.com/JAYChiCubs/status/1822627425777270787
For the uninitiated, Malört is a staple liquor in Chicago that is perhaps the most bitter liquid you'll ever taste. There's almost a sadistic satisfaction in taking swigs or shots of that stuff and surviving. Whether it's an acquired taste to the point where you can drink it on the reg, I'm not so sure. Trust that you'd much rather dive into the world of deep-dish pizza than take any Malört down the hatch. However, if you ever visit the city, it's a rite of passage. You must sip it.
In lieu of giving a damn about baseball at this time of year, hope you enjoyed the Malört backstory, derived from an imagined scenario, mixed with a movie reference. I'm getting too old for this "fighting at a sports event breakdown" sh*t.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kSB_oA6ZoCA
