Joe Rogan… leave our Girl Scout cookies alone.
Some tough news is hitting the world of the Girl Scouts right now. According to some new studies, the cookies that we all love to buy this time of the year might be full of toxic chemicals. And the timing couldn’t be worse for the Girl Scouts, who typically sell their iconic “Thin Mints” and “Peanut Butter Patties” in the beginning of the year and into the spring to help raise money.
To be honest, it’s the only table set up outside of a grocery store that I’ll stop and investigate. There’s nothing like cracking open a box of Girl Scout cookies for the first time in a long time, and typically, when you see them for sale, you’ve got to jump on them. I’ve been known to buy Thin Mints in bulk.
But I might be changing my tune about the delicious cookies, and a lot of other people are in the same boat as I am. On the latest episode of The Joe Rogan Experience, the podcast host and actor Woody Harrelson talked about anything and everything (typical for an episode of JRE). After talking about the safety of modern medicine for a while, the topic turned to something that Rogan had read about recently.
And it had to do with Girl Scout cookies:
“I was reading a study on Girl Scout cookies, where they break them down and find out what’s in them. Holy sh*t, they’re f**king toxic as f**k. There’s so many bad (ingredients).”
I’d typically rather unbox a Girl Scout cookie literally, but Rogan decided he would use his platform to unbox them figuratively. Woody Harrelson added that it’s hard to imagine the Girl Scouts trying to sell you a box of cookies that are in reality a box of toxins:
“If you see the smiling face of a Girl Scout, you can’t imagine she’s going to give you something bad.”
Rogan then read into the results of the study, specifying the ingredients that make up the addictive cookies that we’ve all been known to power through at some point in our lives:
“Thin mints being the worst of the offenders. Five flavors of Girl Scout cookies contained levels of glyphosate and heavy metals above EPA water safety limits. The new investigation found 100% of Girl Scout cookies glyphosate, the controversial herbicide found in Round-Up. 88% contained toxic metals like arsenic, lead and mercury.”
Thin Mints are the worst? That’s terrible news, considering that’s my go-to flavor…
Rogan went on to explain why the Thin Mints are the worst, and to say that I’m sitting here shocked about all of this would be an understatement:
“Thin Mints had the highest glyphosate levels at 111.07 PPB (parts per billion)… 334 times the level of what experts say are harmful.”
Not the Thin Mints. Take the Do-Si-Dos away if you have to, but finding out that my beloved Thin Mints are allegedly the most toxic of them all feels like a punch to the gut. Ironically enough, a literal punch to the gut would apparently be better for you than eating any of these Girl Scout cookies.
As Joe Rogan explained:
If you like Girl Scout cookies.. you need to watch.. VERY IMPORTANT! pic.twitter.com/narJ0KZk7Z
— Santa Trump..
(@lovetocook12345) February 24, 2025
You really hate to see it.
If you are feeling like you’ve suddenly lost something you loved, you aren’t alone. The internet can’t believe the study on the seemingly innocent Girl Scout cookies, and they left replies below the post like these:
Oh God, even the Girl Scout cookies are contaminated.
— Michele Brzezinski (@christianarmy14) February 24, 2025
I should be dead with all the thin mint girl scout cookies i’ve eaten..
— Rock Your World
(@j_unit70) February 24, 2025
(@j_unit70) Oh no!!!! I love thin mints!!! My favorite!
— Grace Cameron (@MetalBendergirl) February 24, 2025
This is just too bad. I used to buy like 10 boxes of thin mints, keep them in my freezer and eat them frozen. Oh well,… Bye Bye Girl Scout cookies.
— Grumpy Old Marine (@GrumpyMarine14) February 24, 2025
Oh wow! Thank God I didn’t stop today and buy a box. I haven’t had a girl scout cookie in years. I almost stopped and got a box of thin mints.
W. T. H!?!?— Heather (@bekind54321go) February 24, 2025
Truly baffling.
The Girl Scout cookie is empire is one that’s worth around $800 million. No one can move cookies like the Girl Scouts, though their sales might drop a bit with this news breaking. And you know what doesn’t make me feel that great about all of this? The Girl Scouts of USA declined to comment on the study. Not a great look…
However, they did comment on the recent headlines, and let’s just say that it wasn’t exactly encouraging:
“A recent report claimed that our Girl Scout Cookies contain certain levels of glyphosate and heavy metals. We want to address these allegations and share the facts: Girl Scout Cookies are made with ingredients that adhere to food safety standards set by the FDA and other relevant authorities. Our trusted bakers remain committed to compliance with all food safety standards and regulations set forth by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA), the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA), and other relevant health authorities. These standards ensure that food products are safe for consumption. As a result, Girl Scout Cookies are safe to consume and are manufactured in accordance with all food safety regulations.”
They went on to say that basically any farmed product has some level of glyphosate and other toxic heavy metals in it:
“Environmental contaminants—which can include heavy metals— can occur naturally in soil. This means that nearly all foods using plant-based ingredients, including organic foods, may contain trace amounts. This does not mean that these foods are harmful to consume. Glyphosate is widely used in agriculture in accordance with established EPA standards and is found nearly everywhere in the food chain. Trace amounts of glyphosate can be found in fresh fruits, vegetables, cereals, baked goods, and other food and beverage commodities.”
Maybe the “established EPA standards” are the problem then? Like I said, not exactly comforting…
Although, I will say, the Girl Scout Cookie cartel is one that I wouldn’t necessarily want to tangle with… but if anyone can take them down, Joe Rogan would be the one to do it.
You can hear Rogan and Harrelson talk about it more in the latest episode of The Joe Rogan Experience:
The post Joe Rogan & Woody Harrelson’s Recent Podcast Has People Swearing Off Girl Scout Cookies: “They’re F***ing Toxic” first appeared on Whiskey Riff.